{"id":42758,"date":"2026-01-11T00:21:39","date_gmt":"2026-01-11T00:21:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/usa\/i-stayed-home-while-my-family-traveled-because-i-needed-a-break-i-loved-my-alone-time\/"},"modified":"2026-01-11T00:21:39","modified_gmt":"2026-01-11T00:21:39","slug":"i-stayed-home-while-my-family-traveled-because-i-needed-a-break-i-loved-my-alone-time","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/usa\/i-stayed-home-while-my-family-traveled-because-i-needed-a-break-i-loved-my-alone-time\/","title":{"rendered":"I stayed home while my family traveled because I needed a break. I loved my alone time."},"content":{"rendered":"<figure><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i.insider.com\/696153be832e0ef1ead782c0?format=jpeg\" alt=\"Woman eating dinner\"\/><figcaption>The author chose to spend the holidays alone and really enjoyed it.<\/p>\n<p>Courtesy of the author<\/p>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<ul>\n<li>I chose to spend the holidays alone while my husband and kids visited family.<\/li>\n<li>Being alone at home gave me rest, quiet, and perspective I didn&#039;t know I needed.<\/li>\n<li>Intentional solitude helped me reset mentally and return to my family refreshed.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>When people asked me what I was doing for the holidays, I responded almost too giddily, &quot;I&#039;m spending it alone.&quot; Their eyes narrowed, &quot;What?&quot;<\/p>\n<p>I told them I was sending my husband and the kids to his family in Massachusetts, and I&#039;d stay back in Pennsylvania. All. By. Myself. I wouldn&#039;t have to answer to anyone or <em>for<\/em> anything. Not requests for snacks or one more backrub. I wouldn&#039;t have to sit rigid, wondering if one of my three kids was creeping out of a bed that wasn&#039;t theirs. Or defend my parenting style while my oldest yelled about how life wasn&#039;t fair and we must all really hate him, and why should he have to listen to anyone anyway.<\/p>\n<p>After a beat, every single mom (and a few dads) told me: &quot;I&#039;m jealous. I want to do that. How did you swing that?&quot; <\/p>\n<h2>I had hit a breaking point<\/h2>\n<p>The decision to be alone during the holidays came slowly at first and then all at once. I&#039;d hit a breaking point that most parents, especially moms, are all too familiar with. But the moment I toyed with the idea of staying back \u2014 in a quiet, clean, empty house \u2014 that was it. It was all I could think about.<\/p>\n<figure><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i.insider.com\/6961599364858d02d21817c9?format=jpeg\" alt=\"Family at the beach\"\/><figcaption>The author&#039;s spouse was supportive of her taking time off.<\/p>\n<p>Courtesy of the author<\/p>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>I broached the topic, gently, with my husband, who couldn&#039;t have been more supportive and emphatic. &quot;You <em>should<\/em> take a few days away!&quot; But I didn&#039;t want to be <em>away<\/em>. I wanted to be home <em>alone<\/em>. That was the key.<\/p>\n<p>As the days ticked closer to The Big Departure, people asked me when Jeff and the kids were leaving. &quot;Wednesday, but I can&#039;t ask when, specifically,&quot; I&#039;d laugh.<\/p>\n<p>I explained to the kids that I needed some alone time; I needed to take a break. They, who are 8, 5, and 3, were relatively unfazed. My middle, big-feeling daughter made me promise to call her every two minutes. I wanted them to know that it was OK for Mom (or Dad) to step away and be alone. It didn&#039;t mean I loved them any less. Something, something about distance making the heart grow fonder.<\/p>\n<h2>Self-care is crucial<\/h2>\n<p>Mental health experts agree. Solitude can be a crucial form of self-care (unless it makes you <em>truly<\/em> uncomfortable to be totally alone). &quot;When you seek out intentional solitude, and the demands on your attention and focus melt away, it allows you to have a level of awareness that can support healing and growth,&quot; Emily Moriarty, M.Ed., a licensed professional counselor and director of clinical services at Reset Outdoors, told Business Insider. <\/p>\n<p>Finally, they were off. And I didn&#039;t know what to do with myself. Everything was weirdly quiet. Clean. Empty. I loved it. I had a couple of low-key plans over the next few days, but my goal was to savor the silence and the lack of a schedule.<\/p>\n<figure><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i.insider.com\/696159d0832e0ef1ead783a9?format=jpeg\" alt=\"Living room\"\/><figcaption>The author really enjoyed her time alone.<\/p>\n<p>Courtesy of the author<\/p>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>When 5 p.m. rolled around on the first night, I started making dinner while listening to music. I danced a little. I ate while reading a book. No one argued with me that they didn&#039;t like what was served. Cleanup was easy. I put my dishes away. I didn&#039;t need to sweep \u2014 <em>I <\/em>don&#039;t spill things on the floor.<\/p>\n<p>I turned my phone off; I didn&#039;t need an alarm. No one needed to reach me, and if they did, they could wait. Dad was more than capable. I slept in. I drank coffee on the couch in front of the fire in my pajamas. I forced myself to allow things to move slowly \u2014 something I have a hard time doing with or without kids.<\/p>\n<p>&quot;Solitude doesn&#039;t include sitting alone in an office working,&quot; Moriarty said. &quot;It has to be non-work, non-caregiving time.&quot;<\/p>\n<p>When it was time for the Big Holiday Meal, I thought I&#039;d feel a little lonely. But I didn&#039;t, and that, I realized, was because this was my <em>choice<\/em>. I knew my family was enjoying themselves with relatives they don&#039;t often see and having a little vacation. And I knew that they&#039;d all be home before I knew it.<\/p>\n<h2>I had a little mom guilt<\/h2>\n<p>By the end of the fourth day, the air was thick with anticipation of the kids and Jeff coming home. I felt like I couldn&#039;t watch TV fast enough. I couldn&#039;t sit in a quiet, empty house fast enough. I couldn&#039;t drink enough coffee fast enough. But when I started making dinner at 5 p.m., awaiting their 8 p.m. arrival, I realized if I had to keep doing this, I might get a little\u2026 bored?<\/p>\n<p>I&#039;m sure that has more to do with the stark contrast of raising three kids, co-running a household, and having a (fairly successful) career, and four days of abrupt, near-total solitude. If I didn&#039;t have kids at all, I&#039;m sure I wouldn&#039;t be bored at 7 p.m.<\/p>\n<p>People have since asked me if this will be my new holiday tradition. I did like it, maybe a bit too much, but it feels wrong to indefinitely celebrate the holidays without my kith and kin. Four days weren&#039;t enough to assuage Mom Guilt, apparently.<\/p>\n<p>Read the original article on Business Insider<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The author chose to spend the holidays alone and really enjoyed it. Courtesy of the author I chose to spend the holidays alone while my husband and kids visited family. Being alone at home gave me rest, quiet, and perspective I didn&#039;t know I needed. Intentional solitude helped me reset mentally and return to my [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-42758","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-usa"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42758","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=42758"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42758\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=42758"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=42758"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/agooka.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=42758"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}